There are three specific times in my life--that I can remember--that I have experienced the harmful and devastating effects of alcohol on people that I care about. Two of these occurred in Brazil, the third being more recent.
While serving my mission in São Paulo, I lived in an interior city called São José dos Campos, in a neighborhood called Jardim Morumbi. My companion and I, Elder Santana, were holding a baptismal service in the church, when a drunk man wandered in asking to hear more about this Mormon church. After the program, we took him into the chapel and sat down with him, teaching him about the church, giving him the standard "first lesson." He was interested in hearing more, so we began meeting with him regularly, after making him promise to be sober so we wouldn't be wasting our time teaching a man who was unable to coherently understand it. He agreed.
With each lesson, he proudly announced to us that he had stopped drinking and was really excited to have a life outside of alcohol. He was later baptized, and actively participated in the church.
Unfortunately, several weeks after Elder Santana was transferred, we received the sad news that Brother Sales, our convert, had suffered a relapse. We went to his humble apartment and found him lying on his bed, drunk into a stupor. I was very upset that he had returned to drinking, as I had been so impressed with the change in his life when he finally relinquished the bottle. I asked him about it, and in a slurred voice he replied that he had been offered a drink by a friend and had been too afraid to deny, and after taking his first drink since sobering up, he fell down the slippery slope and was overcome by the temptation.
I just remember how sad it was to see him so overpowered by a drink, and how it had completely taken over his life. He told me while lying on his bed that night that it was so hard to quit the first time that he didn't think he could ever do it again. Despite our urging and helping him to return to sobriety, it was no use and he returned to the streets, going from bar to bar. Throughout my remaining time in that area, when I would occasionally see him stumbling down the street, bottle in hand, it would also bring sad memories to the front of my mind.
The second experience I had on my mission involved a young man in his early twenties named Adriano, who lived in a neighborhood called Vila Galvão in Guarulhos, near the international airport. He was divorced with a beautiful little girl. He told us that he used to drink, and that vice had destroyed his marriage.
He readily accepted the Gospel and embraced the teachings, being baptized soon after beginning visits with me and my companion, along with his mother. He thrived in the Gospel, making many new friends and really enjoying each week at church. He even hit a bunch of single adult activities including dances and other activities.
However, he took a job that was extremely stressful, and one fateful night when the stress was smothering him, he made the mistake of turning to the bottle. I never saw Adriano drunk like I did Sales, but the fact that he had returned to alcohol after it had sabotaged his family made him so upset with himself that he sent himself into a tailspin. He no longer felt comfortable attending church, feeling inadequate for having relapsed that night, and I was transferred out of the area before I could see him turn around.
Those two examples were during my mission, but I had a more devastating experience the other night, and it was mostly due to the fact that the one brought to his knees by the alcohol was one of my best friends and mentors who I have looked up to for several years now. I saw him so loaded that he was stumbling all over the place and literally had a very hard time stringing two words together.
It was surprisingly very hard to me to watch somebody that I had always taken advice from be brought down to the intelligence level of a small child. Unfortunately, I lost a ton of respect for him that night, and I expect that it will be hard for me to take any advice from him in the future. I hope this will change with time, but only time will tell.
The most upsetting part is that he has already beaten alcohol once several years ago, and vowed never to return to it, as he recognized just how much it had negatively affected his life. I'm just hoping and praying that he makes this same epiphany once again and comes to his senses. Once again, only time will tell.
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